I am in my late 30s and feel like I have entered a midlife crisis in regard to my career. I am paying my bills, but after a decade at the same job, I feel unfulfilled and stuck. I dream of pursuing a more creative career in something like writing or art. The problem with that is I need financial stability and I worry about what my friends and family might think. The fear of change paralyzes me but I long for happiness. How do I find the courage to change while managing my responsibilities and the expectations of others?
– Sincerely,
Caught in the Comfort Zone
Blake Johnson
Blake’s Take
Dear Caught in the Comfort Zone,
Thank you for your question. It’s tough to approach a milestone like midlife and wonder if you’re on the right path. It’s even tougher when dreams of a different life seem to haunt you. Obviously change is the answer, but as you are finding out, it’s not always easy. Responsibilities and expectations can harness our ability to act on every desire without considering consequences.
According to Aniesa Hanson, PhD, in an article from Psychology Today, a midlife crisis is a period of emotional turmoil and strong desire for large-scale change between the ages of 40 and 60. This may cause a person a lot of confusion and uncertainty about their life’s purpose. It is often accompanied by doubt, depression, and anxiety. Impulsive behavior like quitting a job, starting new relationships, or engaging in risky activities can occur. However, Hanson also says that not everyone desiring change during this time is going through a midlife crisis. Sometimes the desire for change is simply a need for growth and development. If you are experiencing paralyzing doubt, depression, anxiety, or excessive confusion, I recommend seeking professional help.
If you are going through a period of growth and development, then you just need to decide what type of change you can live with. Can you be satisfied with a career that meets your financial needs, but doesn’t necessarily bring you joy? If so, maybe a different job in the same or similar field would be rewarding and you could maintain creative fulfillment through a hobby. Sometimes just a change of environment can make a job more appealing.
If you hate what you do or need complete happiness at work, then maybe a fresh start is necessary. You said you need financial stability, but you want to be more creative. The challenge of starting over is the potential financial loss that may come with it. The decade of experience you have in your current field may not transfer to your new job. Starting over in a creative field can be even more challenging. Creative fields are extremely competitive, and many artists and writers endure apprenticeships before ever getting paid. It can take years to become established enough to make money. However, if you feel you have the talent to compete in a creative field and can afford a financial setback, maybe a fresh start is the right move.
There is also a way to transfer careers without causing any financial strain or worry to yourself and others. You can keep your job, or at least stay within the same field, while building a separate career on the side. The beauty of this option is you can build whatever career you want while maintaining financial stability. Many successful careers have arisen from people going back to school or starting an entrepreneurship while working a full-time job. No one can fault you for taking this path, but it may take more of your time. If you need financial security, happiness in a career, and want to avoid worrying your friends and family, this may be the best alternative.
I wish there was an easy solution, but in your circumstance I feel these options make sense. If you need encouragement and more direction, talk to someone you trust. What you desire is achievable; you just need to find your path. Don’t be afraid of change, be prepared.
I hope this helps and I hope you continue to chase your dreams. Even with responsibilities, there is always a way to find happiness in what you do. If it takes more time and work, then the reward will only be sweeter.
May God bless your journey and direct your paths,
